to whom it may concern
Friday, August 21, 2009
So, I've tried. not that this is bugging me TOO much, because I know that you have your own life now, and I know I got mine too. Thinking back to how close we were ? I dont know, maybe I was too young, maybe I liked you too much.. to the point where I couldnt even understand what was going on. We didnt even have anything going on, we were bestfriends, you were my kuya. We'd text day and night, and call each other non stop, but it's all because we were bestfriends. Then you'd go out with somebody, comeback to me and tell me how bad it was.. then I'd comfort you. It was ALWAYS like that. While some other guy was waiting on the side for me, I couldnt even take my eyes off you for a second. But maybe, it was the fact that you were 2 years older. You were my kuya, though I never called you that. I never really told you how much im in like with you. Because until now I think I'm still crushing on you. It's ridiculous, but you remind me so much of my past life, I just cant let go of you. You're one of the biggest reasons I didnt want to leave in the first place. I'm still glad I left though. Or else I wouldve been one of your victims.. or those girls you call "girlfriends". I KNOW for a fact, I'm good & satisfied with where I am now. I just wish we still had that connection that we used to have. But life goes on, I cant hold on to you for too long. I talked to you today, and I know it's not the same. Can't even go a conversation without thinking whether you think im being a snob, or whether you understand what I'm saying. But I am who Iam because of you. I write the way I write, I draw the way I draw, I dance the way I dance, and I sing the way I sing. all because of you. You've really grown on me, beyond the measures of your understanding. I looked up to you, and you never ever did anything to harm me. I love you for that Kel. Thanks for being a part of my life.